# Numbers

One thing I’ve never agreed with were tests in school that were to be like, 40 questions long and each of the 40-odd questions had sub-questions.

For instance, question #1: If Jake threw a rock at 40 km/h at a trajectory of 15 degrees, how long would it take to nail Marcy’s forehead? a)if she is 15 feet away; b)if she is 35 feet away; c)if she is running at 20 km/h down a slope of 5 degrees. See the bullshit? That’s 3 questions, not one. That means a 40 question test is really fuckin’ 120 questions. Why not spare the lies and simply call it what it is?

To further irritate me, why list the sub-questions as letters? Continue with numbers! 1 through 40, not 1 a). Oh, and then there’s this fuck with diagrams all the time: Step 1, Diagram 1: Place battery in dildo; Step 1, Diagram 1.2: Turn on, and so on. Why are we now using decimals to add to the bullshit? Just list it in numerical order! This unnecessary listing technique is a stupid way of making something longer than it has to be. Either pick letters or numbers!

In addition to the jackass way that lists are bullshitted, so are total figures and amounts of things. For example, people in business meetings might mention how third quarter earnings were up 130%. How can this be? I thought 100% was the whole deal. How can it go over 100%? Like, if I were to shit myself so badly that I overflowed the can and had to drop a few in the sink, it might look like 110% of shit because 100% of the bowl is full and the leftovers are in the sink. However, the bowl amount plus the sink portion combined makes up 100% of my total dump. 90% in the toilet and 10% in the sink. Right? Am I right? I don’t know.

What the hell?