I’ve got some stuff I should be doing right now, but the urge to write this is here. Since I only have a few more days of living the self-employed-but-still-broke-starving-artist lifestyle of working on more or less what I want when I want, I’m going to write for a few minutes…
I have mixed feelings about going back to school. On one hand I am nervous as shit. I feel a heightened level of discomfort now because my routine is going to be changed. Not only that, but I will be changing to a routine that is unknown at this point. One of my major concerns is possibly having to poo away from home. I’ve had the freedom to poo at home whenever I want for almost three years, so I guess I’ll have to train my body back to a routine. I really hate having to poo away from home base. It’s just not comfortable. Maybe I should just not think about it until it happens.
Anyway, I wanted to write what’s on my mind, which is a positive spin on something that could very easily be negative. The negative is Crock of Shirt won’t get my full attention. However, the positive is I think it will help me focus on what I have always wanted Crock to be. I always wanted it to be able to support us financially, and that day might still happen, but more importantly, I want Crock to grow more on its own in an organic way. I don’t want to force it. Specifically, I don’t want to ruin my creative interests by drawing stuff that doesn’t interest me or spark me up at that time. Know what I mean? For instance, I haven’t drawn any hockey stuff yet – not because I hate hockey, but because I guess I just haven’t been inspired to do so. That day may come, but I don’t want to have to draw hockey stuff just for the purpose of selling it to hockey fans. The urge to draw a hockey-themed graphic might strike me in mid-summer. Another good example is our Takin’ a Dump design. I drew the original graphic before Crock of Shirt began and I reworked it to the version you know now. I didn’t draw it because I wanted to sell shirts to haul truck drivers; I drew it because I thought it was fuckin’ funny. I realize that’s probably a shitty way of doing business, but I’m not a businessman.
Change is scary. But change might be able to open up a new route for me to take this. Like I mentioned before, the plan now is to use my new education to one day earn enough money to help Crock grow. However, I want to help it grow in a way where people with related interests can find us and not so much us puking out random things in all directions just for the sake of attention. That would be ideal. I guess what I mean with all of this is I don’t want Crock to become a pain in the ass where I have to drag myself to draw shit that’s shit just for the sake of pimping it out for money – I guarantee the artwork will suffer without my excitement behind it. I’m greedy with it. I’m greedy because it’s my artwork and I want it to remain so. If people genuinely like it and it catches fire, there would be no better compliment!